Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
