When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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