Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
