if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!