WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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