I must be too annoying 4 u.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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