she was so not down for the gang bang
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
