my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize