Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I see more hoeing in ur future
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