If i come over, it means nothing
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
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I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
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We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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