Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
