Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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