Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
your thong is hanging out like whoa
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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