Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
