OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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