Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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