Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize