He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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