She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
