we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
