My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
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