accomplished twins. life is a go
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
