my text book just quoted the cookie monster
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
