my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
