Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
The best revenge is premature balding
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Randomize
