I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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