so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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