i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
