There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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