hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize