You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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