and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize