doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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