We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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