Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.

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(913): I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you. http://tfl.nu/mcnp

Replies (68) Good night (2174) Bad night (11530)
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(509): View more from Washington

Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.

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(509): Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN. http://tfl.nu/p4en

Replies (19) Good night (4146) Bad night (443)
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(519): View more from Ontario

While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.

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(519): While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf. http://tfl.nu/v6r3

Replies (22) Good night (3367) Bad night (8384)
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(573): View more from Missouri

You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.

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(573): You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes. http://tfl.nu/p4s9

Replies (23) Good night (6652) Bad night (2054)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.

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(908): All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me. http://tfl.nu/8azw

Replies (16) Good night (777) Bad night (3456)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?

(636): View more from Missouri

our generation is not ready to get married

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(314): Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"? (636): our generation is not ready to get married http://tfl.nu/klk9

Replies (49) Good night (6860) Bad night (2510)
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(440): View more from Ohio

I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.

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(440): I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill. http://tfl.nu/321p

Replies (2) Good night (2447) Bad night (1062)
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(516): View more from New York

That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.

(1-516): View more from New York

yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.

(516): View more from New York

Do you have to put it that way?

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(516): That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him. (1-516): yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him. (516): Do you have to put it that way? http://tfl.nu/hbgy

Replies (21) Good night (6196) Bad night (892)
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(313): View more from Michigan

In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.

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(313): In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact. http://tfl.nu/ir67

Replies (12) Good night (2101) Bad night (941)
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(623): View more from Arizona

This tent reeks of fear and sangria

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(623): This tent reeks of fear and sangria http://tfl.nu/pbhq

Replies (3) Good night (1508) Bad night (623)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.

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(248): Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation. http://tfl.nu/xu6p

Replies (6) Good night (2036) Bad night (610)
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(419): View more from Ohio

There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?

(1-419): View more from Ohio

Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.

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(419): There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night? (1-419): Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass. http://tfl.nu/devs

Replies (12) Good night (1631) Bad night (486)
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(775): View more from Nevada

She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard

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(775): She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard http://tfl.nu/1o8s

Replies (5) Good night (283) Bad night (830)
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(513): View more from Ohio

It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.

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(513): It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is. http://tfl.nu/opxa

Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (203)
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(540): View more from Virginia

Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.

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(540): Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things. http://tfl.nu/f7up

Replies (5) Good night (386) Bad night (338)

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