I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
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i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I would ride that face into the sunset
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
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