I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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