The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize