you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Randomize
