dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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