You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize