Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
