Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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