It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
