is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
How external is "for external use only"?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
