you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
This is classic penis vs brain.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...