I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
