bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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