that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I look better un-naked...
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
