there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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