i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
