Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
